


This is Your Heart

by SmokingThemOutBasements



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Rock Band, Bottom Dean, Eventual Smut, F/F, F/M, Gabriel Being Gabriel, M/M, Singer Castiel, Singer Dean, Top Castiel, Writer Castiel
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-24
Updated: 2018-01-07
Packaged: 2018-12-06 10:17:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 10,130
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11598552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SmokingThemOutBasements/pseuds/SmokingThemOutBasements
Summary: Castiel Novak was living an average life.  He had his small apartment and went to work at the small gas station in town. Then after his brother's convince him to join their band everything changes. Their first single becomes a hit and along the way he falls in love with the talented singer Dean Winchester. How will Castiel's new life style effect him?





	1. Any Average Day

Castiel Novak was a very simple man. He wakes up at 5 a.m to go on a morning run and stop at the local bakery to get a cup of coffee and a blueberry muffin. He would then return home to shower and then write some poetry that he knows is probably shit. At 9 a.m he would get dressed in his black jeans, white button up, and blue work vest. He would walk to the local gas station and work till 7 p.m. He will go home and make some dinner then go to sleep. That had been his routine for the past 3 years.

Gabriel Novak, the third eldest of the family, had thought his younger brothers life was incredibly boring. So he had decided to take matters into his own hands, which takes us to our current scene.

Castiel had just finished his usual shift at Gas n' Sip. He walked home drinking the slushy he decided to take home since he had been thirsty. He reached his apartment building and walked up the seven floors to his apartment. He unlocked the front door to see none other his two brothers.

Balthazar, the fourth eldest, was sitting on the couch with a glass of scotch in his hand. He was dressed in his usual don't give a fuck rocker look. At the other end of the couch was Samandriel or as everyone called him Alfie. He was 4 years younger than Castiel which made him 20 years old. He was dressed in some skinny jeans, maroon button up, and a pair of converses. He sat there awkwardly with his hands in his lap.

Castiel squinted his eyes and tilted his head in confusion. He doesn't remember the two saying they were coming over. "What are you two doing here?" He asked.

"Well that's not anyway to greet your brother's" Balthazar said in his British accent. He was the only one in the family with an accent since for a portion of his childhood he was raised in England.

"How did you even get in?" Castiel questioned as he put his keys in the dish by the door.

"I have a key if you forgot" Gabriel said coming out of the bedroom. Castiel knew he would regret giving his older brother a key, but for some reason he couldn't think of anyone else to give it to. "By the way nice journals" He had one of the leather bound book in his hands open. "The birds are mocking me. They call to be heard. The birds are mocking me. They curse my return" Gabriel read. "What did the birds ever do to you? Did they attack you again at the park?" he joked.

Castiel stormed over to his brother and pulled his journal away from his hands. "Didn't mom ever teach you not to go snooping into people's rooms?"

"Um, You are my brother right? I never listen to what people say" Gabriel plopped down between his two other brother's. "You really know how to write though, Cassie. Which brings me to why we're here"

"Yeah why are we here?" Samandriel asked. "You had just called me yelling at me to hurry up and get here"

"Brother, brother, brother" Balthazar tsked as he shook his head. "Have you not learned to just go with whatever crazy plan Gabey boy here has"

"My plan isn't even that crazy" Gabriel said crossing his arms.

"Than please elaborate" Balthazar pressed before he took a drink from his glass.

"We're gonna become a band!" Gabriel opened his arms out and did jazz hands. All three of them looked at him confused. He sighed and put his arms back to his side. "We're gonna become a band!" He did the same gesture expecting a different reaction. He looked at them defeated. "Really? Why aren't you guys excited?"

"Because unlike you, who is a 26 year old man who acts like a 16 year old, have an actually life" Castiel told him.

"Let's be honest little brother. You're life sucks. You work at a gas station and your name is apparently Steve" He said looking at the name tag. Castiel looked down at it with a frown. His boss thought his name was too complicated so he just put down Steve.

"Well I'm in since I don't have anything better to do" Balthazar said. Gabriel threw his fist in the air and shouted yes.

He then turned to look at Samandriel. "What about you, Alfie?"

He shrugged and said, "Sure. I mean anything is better than Wiener Hut"

"He makes a point" Balthazar noted.

The three of them then turned to look at Castiel. "Come on Cassie. Imagine all the fun we'll have"

The dark haired man looked at his brother's and then looked around his apartment. He didn't know what he was so scared of. His life, as Gabriel had said, sucks so what more can he lose. "I'm in"

"Now you're living life little brother!" Gabriel yelled as he stood up to hug the taller man. Castile just stood there uncomfortable. The hyper man pulled away and clapped his hands. "Now let's get down to business" Gabriel sang.  


  


"I question if he really is our brother" Balthazar said as he watch Gabriel start dancing around the room still singing the song. Castiel sat down where the man child was once sitting.  


  


"He acts more like you guys than I do" Castiel never was like his siblings. He was quiet and had zero social skills. He was everything his brothers weren't.  


  


"You're okay right?" Alfie asked. "You know since the accident"  


  


Castiel looked at the younger man to see him to see he looked worried. "It wasn't an accident if it was purposely done, Samandriel"  


  


"Just leave it alone, Alfie" Balthazar told him. "This should be a joyous time for all"  


  


"Alright" Gabriel was bent over with his hands on his knees. "Since I'm done singing, and thanks for joining me by the way, we should start practicing"  


  


"Um we don't have anywhere to practice at" Alfie said.  


  


"That my sweet bro is wrong" Gabriel ran to the front door and shouted, "Follow me!"  


  


The three men stood up and followed Gabriel to the apartment next to Castiel's place. He opened the door and there was a drum set, keyboards and guitars set up.  


  


"You rented out the apartment next to mine just to form a band. What would have you done if we didn't want to?"  


  


"Then hi I'm your new neighbor" he said waving. "Now let's practice!"  


  


Alfie spoke up again to say, "We don't have any material to work with"  


  


"Did you not just see all those journals Cassie has. That's years worth of lyrics"  


  


"We aren't using my works. It's personal"  


  


"How about we just do some covers till we figure everything out" Balthazar said as he put the guitar strap over his shoulder.  


  


"Alright" Alfie went behind the drums while Gabriel and Castiel went behind a keyboard. Growing up their mother had demanded for them to learn how to play an instrument or play a sport. Of course the brother's decided to play music. Anna had played the harp while Lucifer and Michael picked wrestling.  


  


Now was the moment the men been thankful for all the lessons they took. They played No Scrubs and found themselves mixing different songs with it. Castiel had took it upon himself to sing the lyrics. Anna always said she loved when he sang.  


  


After weeks of rehearsing Castiel finally agreed to use his poetry for their music. He told them that he wanted to form a lay out of the song before they played it together. They agreed so now Castiel found himself sitting on his bed with a keyboard on his bed that was connected to his laptop and several journals surrounding him. He was playing random chords as he hummed along. He found himself singing to one of the poems he wrote about one of his favorite shows, Twin Peaks.

He finished playing and found himself smiling. Then he was laughing and slowly that turned into him crying. He just wrote song out of his shitty poetry. Something good came out of his words.

He got out of his bed with his laptop in his hands. He ran out the front door and through the rehearsal apartment.

He rushed over to the couch where Alfie was sleeping and shook him awake.

"Wake up. Both of you" he lightly kicked Balthazar who was asleep on the floor. He then ran down the small hall to the one bedroom where Gabriel was sleeping. He jumped in the bed and grabbed the extra pillow to hit his brother. "Wake up!"

"Ugh" Gabriel burried his head deeper in his pillow. "It's like 3 in the morning"

"Get up. I have something to show you"

"Just show us tomorrow" he groaned out.

"I guess you don't want to hear the amazing song I created" That instantly woke Gabriel up.

"Let's go" Gabriel got out of the bed and threw on a pair of his jeans that were on the floor. He walked out to the living room area to see his two other brothers were up and set up to play.

Castiel went to his keyboard and adjusted the mic so he can sing while he played. "So just jump in whenever you guys want to"

The three nodded their head understanding. Castiel started playing and after playing the chords once Alfie joined in and soon Gabriel was moving from the keyboard to the synth next to him. He was fidgeting with the dials and then finally joining in after Balthazar who swapped his guitar for his bass. Then Castiel was singing.

_Walking out into the dark_  
_Cutting out a different path_  
_Led by your beating heart_  


  


_All the people of the town_  
_Cast their eyes right to the ground_  
_In matters of the heart_  


  
Gabriel softly harmonized in the background which caused Castiel to smile.

_The night was all you had_  
_You ran into the night from all you had_  
_Found yourself a path upon the ground_  
_You ran into the night you can’t be found_  


  
They paused as Castiel said the first word of the next line. Thy shared a look and smiled as they all played a more upbeat and louder sound.

_But this is your heart_  
_Can you feel it? Can you feel it?_  
_Pumps through your veins_  
_Can you feel it? Can you feel it?_  


  
They let Castiel play a couple chords then went back to the sound they had in the beginning.

_Summer evening breezes blew_  
_Drawing voices deep from you_  
_Led by your beating heart_  


  


_What a year and what a night_  
_What terrifying final sights_  
_Put out your beating heart_  


  


_The night was all you had_  
_You ran into the night from all you had_  
_Found yourself a path upon the ground_  
_You ran into the night you can’t be found_  


  
They were all nodding their head and giving out with their own song as they speed up a bit.

_But this is your heart_  
_Can you feel it? Can you feel it?_  
_Pumps through your veins_  
_Can you feel it? Can you feel it?_  


  
For the next part for some reason they knew what to do. Alfie was playing softly as Gabriel played a beat on the synth as Castiel sang.

_If you had your gun would you shoot it at the sky?_  
_Why?_

Then Castiel joined in on his keyboard.

_To see where it would fall_  
_Oh will you come down at all?_

Then Balthazar joined in as Alfie started to play a little louder.

_If you had your gun would you shoot it at the sky?_  
_Why? To see where your bullet would fall_  
_Oh will you come down at all?_

They all played and Castiel could help but smile and dance a little as he played. 

  


_This is your heart_  
_Can you feel it? Can you feel it?_  
_Pumps through your veins_  
_Can you feel it? Can you feel it?_

_[The song](https://youtu.be/yyv-3kYUYz4) _

They all stopped playing so it was completely quiet except their heavy breathing.

"Holy shit!" Gabriel shouted as he smiled.

"That was incredible!" Alfie shouted out from behind the drum set.

"I feel high. That was" Balthazar paused. "I don't even know the words to say"

"You wrote that" Alfie asked his older brother. Castiel just looked at his shoes as he nodded. "I think we can really make it if you keep writing songs like that"

Castiel was gonna tell him he was wrong when there was knocking on the door. Gabriel walked over and opened the door to see some lady.

"Can I help you?" Gabriel asked as he put a hand on his hip. He was still shirtless but it didn't faze the lady at all.

"I am trying to get sleep and you guys were making all kinds of noise" she complained.

"Sorry. We'll keep the noise down early in the mornings from now on" Alfie said as Gabriel opened the door wider to see into the apartment.

"It's fine. You guys are actually really good. What's your bands name?" Gabriel looked at his brother's to see if they had any names.

Castiel still had his head down as he said, "The Angels of the Lore"

"That's actually a really good name" Gabriel noted. "I guess we're The Angels of the Lore"


	2. Castiel and Social Media

Angel of the Lore had been doing great for the past three months. They had released Laura Palmer which got people's attention. Castiel had kept using his poetry for their music but kept his dark ones hidden from his brother's.

Pompeii was their first single. It went mainstream in less than two days. It was playing on the radio and people wanted to hear more of their stuff. Of course the boys didn't have a record label but several places were trying to get them to sign. They had all agreed to sign to Capital Records and they started recording instantly.

They only had three songs recorded and were still working on the album. They had performed at a few underground bars in LA and New York.

A month ago they started tour. They were opening for some band that they didn't know, but they knew they had to be pretty famous. They had gone to playing in bars to playing sold out shows.

Castiel had been silent through all the bands progress. He didn't talk to fans or do interviews. He let Gabriel or Balthazar do all the talking. Alfie said more than Castiel and he only spoke five sentences.

Gabriel had started to worry about his little brother and they had a talk. It was more of Gabriel talking to Castiel while Castiel just stared at the floor. He had told his younger brother how he felt that he was worse than before they started the band. He finally told Castiel the real reason why he started all this. He was worried about Castiel's mental state and hoped that playing music would get Castiel to be more social and just happy in general. 

Of course once Gabriel was about to start about the "accident" Castiel got up and got out of their touring van.

So that's why now Castiel was sitting in a plush chair that was in there backstage room. He had his phone out and was watching as the two apps started to download.

He figured he should take his brother's advice and he figured he should start with social media. He tapped on the Instagram app and started putting in his information to make his account. After that he was utterly confused.

"Hey baby bro" Gabriel said walking in. He decided to pretend that their conversation never happened. "What's got you all confused?"

"I made an Instagram"

"Say no more" Gabriel said cutting him off. He walked over to sit next to the taller man. "So let's start off by you following our band account and if you want you can follow your brother's"

"Of course I'll" Castiel left his hand to make quotation marks as he said, "follow your accounts"

Gabriel showed his little brother how to follow people and of course it came with several questions.

"So I can unfollow people?"

"Why would I block someone?"

"What does this button do?"

"Are there any bee accounts?"

"Can I follow all the bee accounts?"

"Alright now you should make your first post. You can take a picture or video of anything you want"

Castiel looked around with a look of concentrate on his face. Then he looked at his older brother. "I don't know what to take a picture of"

"How bout a simple picture of you?" Gabriel suggested.

Castiel nodded his head and handed Gabriel his phone. "Can you take it?"

"Of course" Gabriel aimed the camera at the lead singer and said, "Pose" Castiel gave his brother a look that some would call a bitch face. "Perfect. Here you go"

Castiel took his phone back and looked at the picture and thought it look okay.

"You can pick a filter if you want" Gabriel suggested.

Castiel went through each filter until he settled with the one call 1977. He liked how it made the picture look vintage.

"Alright. Now you can put a caption if you want"

"Okay" Castiel started typing and than looked at his brother. Gabriel just pointed at the button to press and Castiel pressed it. 

_**@** _ _**CastielNovak** _ _**: 1977** _ _**insp** _

  
Castiel's eyes went wide as he watched a bunch of icons pop up at the bottom. "What's happening?"

"That shows all the people liking, commenting, and starting to follow you" he informed him.

"Interesting" was all Castiel said.

The door to the room opened to show Balthazar. "It's time to do soundcheck"

"Alright" the two stood up and followed Balthazar to the stage.

"Nice photo by the way Cassie. It's about time you get on social media"

"Whatever" Castiel grumbled as he started fixing his mic.

"Did you guys here about who's coming to the show tonight?" Alfie said excited.

"Doubt we're gonna care" Gabriel scoffed.

"The Hunter's" Gabriel quickly turned his head to look at the 20 year old in shock.

"The Hunter's! You're kidding!" He shouted.

"Who are The Hunter's?" Castiel softly asked.

"They are the greatest indie rock band ever. It helps that their all good looking too. Especially that Sam Winchester. I'll like to climb that tree"

"First off, gross" Balthazar said. "Second off, why should we care?"

"Because imagine doing a song with them. Cassie your voice with Dean's would sound amazing" Alfie said.

"I'm not interested" was all Castiel said as his brother's kept going on about this other band. True be told Castiel was intrigued with the band. Especially this Dean Winchester guy.


	3. The Night

Castiel had went though with soundcheck and the greet and meet like usual. He didn't talk much to anyone except the hi's to fans. Every music article about The Angels of the Lore had wondered why the lead singer was so mysterious. Of course the only thing different about Castiel today is that he couldn't stop thinking about the name Dean. He kept telling himself that it was only because Gabriel had thrown out the idea that the singer might want to collaborate. He was tempted to look at Dean's account on Instagram but he wanted to meet him properly. His brother's haven't said if they were able to get the band backstage passes.

Gabriel knew that his little brother was intrigued with Dean. So he took it upon himself to totally make sure that The Hunters got backstage passes. The brother's were in the green room waiting for them to be called on stage. Castiel was playing his practice keyboard to warm up. He watched as Gabriel stood up from his seat and walk out the room. He tried not to show his interest since he knew Balthazar would call him out on it. 

"I have returned with guests" Gabriel moved to the side to show a blond woman. 

"Hi. I'm such a big fan" She instantly went and hugged Alfie and Balthazar.

"You're gonna scare them away Jo" A man with a mullet said. He had a flannel on with the sleeves ripped off and some loose jeans. He looked like the party type.

"Shut up Ash" Jo shot back which caused the two to start arguing

"Please excuse them. They are like that about all the time" Castiel looked at the tall man wondering if he was Dean, but by the way that Gabriel was looking at him he figured not. "I'm Sam Winchester. It's nice to meet you guys"

Sam made sure to shake everyone's hands including Castiel's. Then someone walked in stumbling a little bit. Castiel looked and froze.

The man was the most beautiful person he has ever seen. He had blondish brown hair that was styled nicely. He wore a plaid flannel with the sleeves rolled up with some black skinny jeans. He wore black boots and leather bracelets on both wrists. Castiel mostly noticed his green eyes. They were so beautiful and don't get him started on the freckles that were scattered on the man's face and arms. Castiel wanted to trace every one and see if there were more.

"Sorry. Did I miss anything?" He asked. His voice was deep and was smooth. Castiel couldn't help but love it.

"Naw man" Sam said. "Everyone this is my brother Dean"

Everyone said hi but Castiel kept staring. Dean was looking around the room but stopped to look at Castiel.

To be completely honest, the man was by far the hottest guy Dean has ever seen. Sure Jo had showed Dean pictures of the band and knew that the lead singer was attractive, but in person it was different. The picture didn't truly show how blue the man's eyes were or the sex hair he had. Dean couldn't help but wonder how much more wild it would be after having sex with him.

"Hi" Dean breathed out as he kept eye contact with the slightly shorter man.

"Hello" Castiel said in a breathy voice as well. Dean's hand twitched at his side since the man's voice went straight to his dick.

Sam looked at Gabriel and both of them had a knowing smirk on their faces. Sam knew that his older brother has a crush on Castiel. Of course Dean would never admit it since he was actually still in the closet. He had figured that his little brother wouldn't notice when he checked out guys but he did.

"Guess we're gonna be step brother's soon" Gabriel said elbowing Sam's side.

"That won't be weird at all" Sam winked at Gabriel and walked over to his band mates.

Gabriel went after Sam and started to bug him about what he meant.

Dean had walked closer to Castiel while their brothers were talking. Castiel was still standing behind his keyboard but watched Dean's actions.

"I'm Dean" he mentally face palmed since he felt so stupid.

"I'm Castiel" he said back.

"So Cas" Dean looked down at his shoes since he felt like he was staring to much. Castiel couldn't help put smile a little at the nickname. "You excited for the show?"

"I suppose. It's always a thrill to play our music for people" Castiel respond.

"I totally get ya. It's so great to hear people sing back the words you've written" Dean looked up and green eyes met blue. He couldn't help but feel like Cas was staring into his soul. Dean's dick couldn't help but take even more interest in the man. "What are you doing after the show?" Dean didn't even realize what he was saying. He was gonna apologize but Cas smiled at him. Dean felt like he wasn't gonna last the night if Cas kept smiling at him like that.

"I believe my brothers wanted to go out for drinks with you guys afterwards, but I was just gonna go back to the hotel"

"Oh I was thinking we can maybe hang out later" Castiel tilted his head and squinted at the green eyed man.

"You mean like back to my hotel to"

"No" Dean quickly cut him off shaking his head. "I mean that would be nice but I was thinking more like go to a diner I know"

"Oh so like a date?" Cas asked still slightly confused.

"Yeah" Dean nodded. "And maybe... I mean if you want we can go back to the hotel. It's up to you really"

"I will love to go on a date with you, Dean"

"Look at Cassie" Balthazar said to the group. "I feel like a proud father"

"He's finally gonna get laid after years" Gabriel smirked as he watch the two interacting.

"Gross. I really don't want to think about my brother having sex" Sam shook his head trying to get the disgusting thought out of his mind.

The door to the green room opened and Inias, the bands audio tech, walked in. "Hey guys. It's time to get on stage"

"Sweet. Let's get this show on the road" Gabriel stood up clapping his hands together. He always got his brothers pumped to put on a good show.

"I hope you like our performance" Cas said to Dean.

"I'm sure I will" Dean smiled and watched as the brothers walked out the room to head to the stage. A woman came in with a clipboard and looked at the strangers in the room.

"Hello, I'm Hannah and I'm gonna take you to the VIP section" Jo and Ash followed her excited. Sam noticed his brother was still standing in the same spot.

"You coming, Dean?" Sam asked.

"I'm gonna stick around back here. You go Sammy" Dean told him.

"Alright" Sam knew he just wanted to be able to see Castiel after the show faster. Dean walked to the side stage to see that it was pitch black. The lights came on but it was red and the smoke machine was on. All any one can see was the bands shadows. Balthazar started playing the bass line of their song Bad Blood and there was a spot light on him. Then another spotlight shun on Alfie as he played the drums. Then it went to Gabriel as he raised his hand while the other played the keyboard. Then long behold there was Castiel singing.

_Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, whoa, oh, oh_

Dean watched as Cas did his awkward dance as he sang. Dean was completely hypnotized with his movements and his voice. The way he'll jump up and down as he transitioned to the chorus. How he would use hand gestures to demonstrate how his voice was going high and low. 

Once the song was over, Gabriel stated talking to the crowd.

"How you doing Lawrence, Kansas?" he yelled into his mic. The crowd cheered as the rest of the band was getting ready for the next song. Dean watched as Cas took a sip of his water. "So for people who don't know us we're The Angels of the Lore" The crowd cheered again. Castiel was always surprised that the crowd knew who they were since they were an opening act. "I'm Gabriel and yes I know I'm sexy" Castiel laughed as he moved to his mic.

"Who told you that lie?" Cas said. Some people laughed while some were looking at the stage in shock.

"Your mom!" Gabriel shouted back.

"We have the same mom assbutt"

Dean smiled since who calls someone assbutt.

"If you haven't noticed that sexy beast singing with the wild hair, that is Castiel" He waved and did a little bow. "The man killing it on the bass is Balthazar and yes, he's always been awesome. The young man behind the drums is Alfie. Now that introductions are done with how about we get this show on the road"

They played two more songs and they let the music fade out and the lights dim. Castiel went back to his water as the lights started to come back on.

"So this next song some of you guys may have heard of" Cas glanced to look at where Dean was standing. "Do you know Of The Night?" Dean nodded his head as he looked at him confused. "Then get that cute butt of yours out here"

Everyone can see under the lights that Castiel blushed at what he said. Dean just smiled since he thought the bashful look on the other man was adorable.

Dean walked on stage and the crowd went crazy. Phones started flashing and people were screaming Dean's name.

"Think you can help me out with this one" Dean couldn't help but think it was a sexual innuendo.

"I'd love to help, Cas" Dean said into the mic Hannah handed to him. Cas gave the signal for his brothers to start playing.

(Castiel is italics. Dean is underline italics. Both is bold italics. Backtrack is bold.)

 _Rhythm is a dancer,_  
_It's a souls companion,_  
_People feel it everywhere,_  
_Lift your hands and voices,_  
_Free your mind and join us,_  
_You can feel it in the air,_  
_Oh woah_  
_It's a passion_  
_Oh oh_  
_You can feel it yeah_  
_Oh oh_  
_It's a passion,_  
_Oh oh, oh, oh, oh,_

 _You can put some joy up on my face,_  
_Oh sunshine in an empty place,_  
_Take me too, turn to and babe I'll make you stay,_  
_(Oh yeah)_

Dean was dancing a little to the beat as Cas was singing and trying to get the crowd to sing along.

 ** _Oh I can ease you of your pain,_**  
**_Feel you give me love again,_**  
**_Round and round we go,_**  
**_Each time I hear you say,_**

They were both jumping up and down with the crowd to beat. Cas was hitting the drum as he did.

 **This is the rhythm of the night,**  
**The night,**  
**Oh yeah,**  
**The rhythm of the night,**  
**This is the rhythm of my life,**  
**My life,**  
**Oh yeah,**  
**The rhythm of my life,**

 _ **The rhythm of my life,**_  
_**This is the rhythm of the night, the night, oh yeah,**_  
**_The rhythm of the night,_**  
_**This is the rhythm of my life, my life, oh yeah,**_  
_**The rhythm of my life,**_

 _Wont you teach me how to love and learn,_  
_There'll be nothing left for me to yearn,_  
_Think of me and burn and let me hold your hand,_

Dean held Cas' hand to showing the meaning of the lyric.

 _ **Oh yeah-ah-eh,**_  
_I don't want to face the world in tears,_  
_Please think again, I'm on my knees,_

Cas got on his knees in front of Dean like he was praying.

 _Sing that song to me,_  
_No reason to repent,_

Dean placed his finger under Cas' chin signaling him to stand up.

 ** _This is the rhythm of the night, the night, oh yeah,_**  
_**The rhythm of the night,**_  
_**This is the rhythm of my life, my life, oh yeah,**_  
**_The rhythm of my life,_**  
**_This is the rhythm of the night, the night, oh yeah,_**  
_**The rhythm of the night,**_  
**_This is the rhythm of my life, my life, oh yeah,_**  
**_The rhythm of my life,_**

Dean played the drum part that Gabriel usual did while singing his part.

_This is the rhythm of the night, the night, oh yeah,_  
_The rhythm of the night,_  
_This is the rhythm of my life, my life, oh yeah,_  
_The rhythm of my life,_

_This is the rhythm of the night, the night, oh yeah._

Dean immediately hugged Cas after the song. They both had smiles on their faces since performing together was such a rush.

"I'll see you after the show" Dean whispered into Cas' ear.

"You're not staying?" Cas whispered back.

"Of course I am silly" Cas can hear the smile through Dean's voice. Dean kissed Cas' cheek before pulling out of the hug. They held hands as Cas walked Dean back to the side.

While the band was performing the next song, Dean couldn't help but let reality set in. The fans have pictures of him being all loving towards Cas like they were boyfriend which they weren't...yet. The thing that scared Dean was that he practically outed himself out. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comment what you think will happen on their date.


	4. The Date Part 1

Castiel waved at the crowd as the band gave their final bow. The show went wonderful as usual, but for Cas it was better than any show they have ever played. He was so happy that Dean agreed to come on stage with him. He had to remember to talk to Dean about maybe having The Hunters do a collaboration with The Angels of the Lore. Of course that is if he remembers to since other thoughts to do with Dean was running through his head.

He walked off the stage to be hugged by Dean. "That was such an incredible show" Dean said into Cas' shoulder.

"I'm glad you enjoyed it" Cas said back. He then moved to whisper into Dean's ear. "Let's get out of here"

He felt the other man nod so he pulled out of the hug. He waved bye to his brothers which they did back with large smiles on their face. Dean was holding his hand while leading them to the front exit. Cas pulled his hand so he knew to stop walking. "This way"

Castiel lead them to the back exit where no fans were waiting for them. He usually wouldn't mind the fans but right now he wanted to be alone with Dean.

"Very smart choice Mr. Novak" Dean said with a smile. Cas smiled back as he swinged their joined hand between them.

"That's the way I usually leave" Cas told him.

"Not much of a people person?" Dean asked as they kept walking.

"No. Never had been. Tonight was the first time the fans heard me speak more than one word" Dean looked at him in shock.

"You're lying"

"Nope. This is my serious face" Dean laughed and Castiel found that he wanted to hear that laugh again.

"No, but really?" Dean said after he stopped laughing. "You said more than one word when we met"

Castiel stopped walking causing Dean to come to a halt as well. He turned to look at Cas to see he was staring at him with a look in his eye. Something that Dean has never seen before.

"There's something about you Dean Winchester. I'm not sure what it is but I wanna figure it out"

"We have all our lives for you to figure it out" Dean said. He knew if Sammy was here he would laugh at Dean for having a chick flick moment but with Cas he couldn't care. There was something about Cas that made him want to live those moments. Dean smiled and looked at the floor. Castiel couldn't help but smile since Dean's was so infectious.

"What?" Cas asked as Dean shook his head.

"Nothing. Just remembered something" Cas stared into Dean's green eyes in wonderment. "Come on" Dean tugged on their joined hands. "I don't know about you but I'm starving"

"Lead the way" Cas said smiling.

"Do you mind if we walk? Fans are probably surrounding my car" Dean asked.

"I don't mind" Cas actually prefered walking over driving.

"So why don't you tell me more about yourself? What does Castiel Novak do?" Dean teased.

"Well I was born in England. To be more specific Bath, England. I have five brothers and one sister. When I was two months old we moved to New York where I grew up at. After I graduated I went to Columbia university for journalism. Two months from graduation I dropped out due to reasons.... well it was mostly me. I then moved to Rexford, Idaho where I lived a quiet life. Then three years later The Angels of the Lore got together. The rest is history"

"That sorta explains Balthazar's accent" Dean stated. "What are your other siblings names?"

"Michael and Lucifer. I'm the second youngest boy of the family. Anna is the baby" Castiel told him.

"I'm guessing your parents are very religious?"

Castiel nodded and then asked, "What about you? What's your life been like?"

"Well I grew up here in Lawrence. Sammy is my younger brother and we also have a half brother named Adam. He lives in Minnesota with his mom. My mom died when I was young and our dad is somewhere. He left when I was sixteen. Our family friend Bobby took us in. Oddly enough he married Jo's mom, Ellen. I didn't graduate high school since I dropped out to take care of Sammy for a period of time. I use to be a mechanic at Bobby's shop. I would also take up odd jobs to get extra cash to send to Sammy. He went to Stanford to study law. When I was 24, Ash and Benny, who both worked at Ellen's bar, asked Sammy and I if we wanted to form a band. We did since Sammy needed the distraction after dropping out. So here we are"

"Sounds like you lived quite a life" Castiel said. He was gonna ask why Sam dropped out of college but felt that he would be invading the other Winchester's privacy.

"I guess so. This is the place" Cas looked to see that it was a diner that had neon lights.

They walked in still holding hands and sat down at a booth. A waitress walked over smiling.

"Hey Dean. Long time no see. Who's your friend here?" She asked.

"Yeah. I've been on tour up until now. This is Castiel. Cas, this is Shannon" Dean introduce.

"Nice to meet you Castiel. I've known this guy for awhile. He always comes in here demanding for a burger" she said as she put the menus down on the table. "What can I get you guys to drink?"

"Um I'll have a water" Cas said.

"Alright. What about you?" She turned to look at Dean.

"I'll have the same" Cas noticed the hint of surprise on her face but didn't comment on it.

"Alright. I'll be right back" she walked away and Cas started looking at the menu. Dean put his at the end of the table and just stared at Cas. Shannon came back and sat the drinks down and walked away. Dean put the straw in his iced water and took a sip.

He then went back to staring at Castiel. He just couldn't help it. He still looked a little sweaty from the show and it seemed like his hair was even more wild than when they met.

"So" Dean found himself looking down and playing with the wrapper as Cas looked up at him. "You never really said why you don't like talking much"

Cas smiled lightly at Dean's hesitation to ask the unanswered question. He placed his menu on the table and looked at the other man.

"Growing up I just kept to myself. My brothers are loud and obnoxious sometimes. My father always told me I was different. I was kind spoken and I always worried about others" Castiel now found himself looking down into his water. "After my father died I didn't really have anyone"

Dean looked up to see Cas casting his eyes down. He can see the sadness through his body language. He followed his instinct and moved his hand to be on top of Cas's. Castiel looked at their hands and turned his over so their fingers can lace together. Dean lightly squeezed his hand to know it was okay to keep talking.

"That's why I stopped talking fully. I didn't see the point of communicating with people I didn't really like. Gabriel ended up understanding me in a way. He told me he knew what I was thinking by my facial expressions. He ended up talking to people for me. I started talking again once I was in college. I didn't want to but I had to. A lot of stuff happened when I was away from home. Problems arose within the family and with people I considered to be friends"

Dean noticed that Cas was looking at their hands or so he thought. Castiel had his eyes on something else that he hoped Dean wouldn't notice. He really didn't want Dean to ask about that.

"After I dropped out I went back to not talking. The only thing I said was "your total is" and "here's your change. Have a nice day." When the band started to get more mainstream I still kept quiet" Castile finished telling him.

Dean was about to ask him more about college, but Shannon came over to take their order. Castiel had oddly enough ordered the same thing that Dean usually gets.

"I know this might be too personal so it's okay if you don't want to answer it, but how did your father die?" Dean asked. Castiel had went back to staring at their conjoined hands and started rubbing his thumb over Dean's knuckles.

"Car accident. Some guy ran the red light and collided with his car. He died on impact"

"I'm sorry" Dean knew how hard it was to lose a parent but Castiel was older by the time his father died. Dean only had small memories with his mom.

"Yeah. The thing that hurts the most is my family blamed me for his death" Dean looked at Cas with wide eyes since he couldn't imagine why they would say that. "Mom told me if I was never a difficult child a lot of things would be different. She said some crude things to me. That's another reason I became selectively mute. I knew she was right"

Castiel finally looked up to see Dean looking at him with so much sadness in his green eyes. He suddenly felt guilty. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to get really dark. Not a good impression"

"It's fine, Cas. Whatever fucked up things she said to you I'm sure they're not true"

'That's a lie' the voice in Castiel's head said. He went back to looking at the freckles on Dean's hand.

"I've only known you for a few hours and I think you're amazing" Dean could tell that Cas still felt guilty about making the conversation so sad so Dean wanted to even the playing field.

"My mom died in a house fire when I was five" Castiel looked at Dean so he knew he was listening. "It was an electric shortage. My dad changed after she passed away. He would leave me and Sammy at Bobby's to go drink at a bar. When I was 11 years old he would take us to a hotel and leave us there for days as he went to gamble and drink his life away. As I got older he started to say fucked up things to me like your mom did. He also did some fucked up things to me physically"

Castiel looked at Dean with anger in his eyes. "What did he do to you?" He practically growled out shocking Dean.

"It was nothing"

"What did he do to you?" Castiel demanded to know.

"He use to hit me when he was drunk. The worst beating I got was when he caught me and Benny together"

"Your bandmate?" Castiel tilted his head confused.

"Yeah" Dean nodded his head. "I was 14 years old and I wanted to try stuff out. We were only kissing when Dad walked in. As soon as he saw he started beating me. Benny tried to get him off but back then he was just a scrawny kid like me"

"I'm sorry you're father did that to you. You didn't deserve any of that for just being yourself"

"Yeah. I sometimes wish my mom was around. I'm sure my life would be entirely different"

"I would hope maybe in that life we would still meet"

"I'm sure we would. Now that I think about it you look like my type" Dean pictured Lisa and all his one night stands. "Black hair, blue eyes, and quiet demeanor"

Castiel gave Dean this shy yet oddly confident smile that made Dean's heart flutter.

Shannon walked over with there plates and placed them on the table.

"Is there anything else I can get you guys?" She asked.

"By any chance do you have honey?" Castiel asked looking up at her.

"Um" she looked over at Dean confused. He just shrugged and nodded his head to Cas. "Let me go check"

She walked towards the counter and came back with the little bear container that held honey. "Thank you" he said.

Dean watched as Castiel opened the lid with a small smile as he poured the thick substance on his fries.

"I have to get this on camera" Dean said as he moved to sit next to Castiel. He pulled his phone out and opened Instagram.

"So I just found out that Cas likes putting honey on his fries"

"It's good" Castiel said off camera.

"It's weird" Dean looked at Cas with amusement more than disgust.

"Try it" Castiel lifted a French fry and held it up to Dean's lips. Dean ate it and gave a light moan. Castiel of course took interest in the noise since he technically caused the sound to come out of Dean. He wondered what other noises he can get out of the man.

"Fuck" Dean whispered as he looked at Castiel with amazement. "That was really good"

Castiel had a smirk and said, "I told you"

"Guess you have a lot of good things to show me" Dean bit his lip as he thought of all the things Cas could do to him.

"Maybe" Cas flirted back. Before Dean can make a comment back he felt his phone vibrate. He looked to see Jo had texted him.

"Sorry" Dean apologized as he opened up the message.

**_From Homegirl Jo: Sam told me you ditched us to go on a date. Benny is tempted to find you and hold up a sign saying, "Get that Novak dick!"_ **

Dean laughed and Castiel looked at him as he took a bite of his fry. "Jo had just messaged me" he explained. "Just something Benny told her" he started texting her back as he moved to sit back across from Cas.

**_To Homegirl Jo: You both stay the fuck away._ **

He sent the text and went back to Instagram to post the video. He didn't rewatch it or put a filter but he did put a caption.

**_@deanwinchester: Fries with honey on top w/ @castielnovak_ **

He put his phone into his pocket and looked to see Cas drinking some water. They both started eating their burgers in a comfortable silence. Dean would steal some of Cas's fries because he just couldn't help himself.

Their plates were soon empty, so Shannon took them, and they were just drinking the last of their water.

"Alright. So say that you did get your high school diploma. What would you go to college for?" Castiel asked.

"Hm. I don't know. I always wanted to be a firefighter so I would go to school for that" Dean answered.

"I can see that. So the Winchester family would have a firefighter and a lawyer" Cas said smiling. Dean laughed as he somehow found his hand in Cas's.

"Guess we would have" Dean nodded. "What about the Novak's? What would you all be doing around this time?"

"Well Gabriel would have either became a porn star or open a bakery" Dean laughed and Cas shook his head. "Those are his words not mine" Castiel added. "Balthazar would some how join another band. Alfie was working at Wiener Hut before the band. He never really know what he wanted to do with his life. Anna is at Julliard. She plays the most instruments in the entire school. I'm not sure what Michael and Lucifer are doing"

"Sounds like a fun family reunion" Dean sometimes wish that he had more siblings but he was happy with Sam and Adam.

"Here" Shannon placed a plate of apple pie with ice cream on top between the two men. "It's on the house" she placed two spoons and walked away.

"That was nice of her" Castiel said. "I do enjoy pie"

"Thank God for that. If you didn't I would force you to eat a whole one" Dean joked.

"I will gladly eat all of it" Cas scooped some of the pie and ice cream eat ate it with a smile.

"Well you better share" Dean grabbed the other spoon and got a piece.

"Gladly" The two sat there eating he pie and sharing glances. Castiel had wanted to pay the bill when Shannon brought it over, but Dean was insistent on paying. They started walking towards the venue holding hands when Dean's phone started ringing. He looked to see it was Sam.

"Sorry. I have to take this" Castiel nodded as Dean answered the call. "Hey Sammy. What going on?"

"I just wanted to give you a heads up so don't kill me for interrupting your date"

"I'll figure out if I want to kill you if you'd hurry up and get to the point?" Dean said slightly annoyed.

"Alright so apparently fans are still by your car"

"Give me the phone, giant man!" Dean couldn't help but smile as he heard Benny yell in the background.

"No. Stop that!" Sam shouted.

"Hey, cher. I went to baby to get my cigarettes I forgot in there the other night. I was unkindly welcomed to several fans waiting to see you and the singer Novak" Benny explained.

Dean nodded his head as he said, "That's fine. I'll probably just wait out the storm"

"Alright. See you later" Benny hung up and Dean pocketed his phone again.

"I guess you're gonna be stuck with me for awhile longer"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comment what you think will happen in the second part. Thank you to whoever took the time to read this.


	5. The Date Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning for talk of self harming and suicide.

Castiel and Dean kept walking down the street holding hands. Dean felt bad that the fans had managed to miss up Castiel's only way to get rid of him. Dean felt slightly awkward in the silence. He wasn't use to it. He always had some kind of noise going on. Even as a kid he had a young Sammy bugging him or Benny talking about music. 

"So..." Castiel looked at Dean and noticed he was uncomfortable. "Out of all the songs you perform which is your favorite?" 

"Um...I guess Laura Palmer. Mostly because it was the first song we put together. I still feel that thrill when we perform it" Dean nodded his head understanding. "What about you?"

"I love performing Ban All the Music since we make it longer than the studio version. I also like playing Hostage" Dean said. 

"Um.. yeah" Castiel said.

Dean then realized why the other man was quiet as he was talking. "You've never heard of our music have you?" 

"To be completely honest, I have not" Dean nodded his head which made Castiel feel the need to explain. "I honestly hardly listen to music beside what my brothers put on or classical music when I need to calm down. I'm sure-"

Dean cut Castiel short by kissing him. Cas was shocked but kissed back. Dean pulled away with a smile. "You look cute when you rant." 

"Do I?" Cas' voice was slightly rough and breathless. 

"Yeah. You always look cute, Cas" Dean leaned in and softly kissed him again. Cas put his hands on Dean's waist pulling him closer as he kissed back. Dean moaned into Castiel's mouth as he moved his hands to tangle into the dark messy locks. Dean can taste the honey and apple pie on Cas' tongue and something that was purely Cas. He didn't want to stop licking and biting into Castiel's mouth. He wanted to feel Cas's body pressed against him forever. 

A car honked their horn causing the two to jump apart. Dean looked to see the car far away now. He turned back to the other man to see he was still looking at him. He felt like those blue eyes were looking into his soul. That he knew every secret of his and that scared the shit out of him.

"Do you want to go back to my place? It's close by" Dean asked.

"Sure. I'm sure people are still surrounding your car and the hotel I'm staying at is pretty far from here" Castiel said. Dean smiled and held Cas' hand to lead the way back to his apartment. It was only a block away so they got there pretty fast. Dean lead him up the stairs to the fourth floor and to his door. He unlocked it and hoped in his mind that he didn't leave anything out. He opened the door to see he didn't which was a relief. "It's not much"

"I like it. Has a more comfortable enviorment than my place back in Idaho" There was a oak coffee table and a red couch. There was a decent size tv against the wall opposite to the couch. There was a archway leading to what he could assume was the kitchen. Then there was a hallway with two door that he guessed was the bathroom and bedroom.

"You thirsty?" Dean asked as he took off his jacket and hung it up on the coat rack. 

"Sure. You have water?" Dean nodded and walked to the kitchen. Cas just sat down on the couch awkwardly since he didn't know what to do. He can hear cabinets opening and the fridge door opening. He also heard a rattle noise and a glass being put down.

"Here you go" Dean handed him a glass as he sat down next to him. 

"Thanks" Cas took a sip and then looked down at the glass. Dean just watched him be awkward since he oddly thought it was adorable. He also noticed Cas sticking his finger under his bracelet on his left arm. 

"I like your bracelet" Cas jumped and immediately hid his wrist with his hand. That's when Dean knew. He looked down at his own bracelets. He slowly nodded his head and swallowed the lump in his throat. "Sammy got me mine" He was too nervous looking up to see Castiel's face. He kept turning the leather bound bracelets around his wrist. "I remember his face when he gave them to me. He knew I was ashamed. I was only 15 years old. He gave them to me after they took off the bandages. He smiled and I can tell he was holding back tears. It killed him when he found out I was doing it again. He had bought me other one's every time but I only wear these since they were the first one's he gave me"

"Anna gave me this one" Dean looked up to see Cas was looking at his bracelet still. "She laughed and said that she was originally gonna get the rainbow colored one, but they sold out. She settled for this red and yellow one. I remember her crying. Telling me how scared she was. How she was trying to not cry loudly on the plane. I remember not feeling anything when she or my brother's were crying or telling me how scared they were. I still don't" Cas then looked up at Dean with tears running down his face. "Is something wrong with me?" 

Dean moved closer to the crying man and rest his hand on his cheek. His thumb wiped away the stray tears. "Nothing is wrong with you, Cas. I feel the same way. You just want to forget. You don't want to hear how other people feel. You just want it to end" Dean said softly. 

"It almost did end. Just if they were a minute late I would of been dead. To this day, I wish that they were" Dean's heart was hurting after hearing those words coming out of Cas' mouth. He shook his head and felt himself crying. He rested his head against Cas' and just cried. They sat there crying for what felt like hours. "Dean" Castiel said once the tears stopped. "I'm sorry"

"Don't be. Don't ever be sorry" Dean whispered. Castiel then closed the gap by softly kissing Dean. The kiss was soft and slow. It was slightly salty from their tears, but yet still sweet from the honey they ate earlier. Cas pulled away before the kiss became more dirty. Dean then stood up and held out his hand. 

"Come on" he tilted his head towards the hallway. Castiel took Dean's hand and stood up. Dean lead him down the hall into his bedroom. It wasn't anything special. His bed was in the middle and nightstands on both sides. He had a table against the wall that had a record player and stereo on top. Underneath it there were milk crates filled with what Castiel assumed to be records. Next to the table was a dresser. The opposite wall was mirror. Dean moved them towards the bed and lightly pushed Castiel down. He sat down and Dean just stayed standing. They were still holding hands as Cas looked up at Dean.

Cas moved his free hand to Dean's hip. Dean smiled lightly and let go of Cas' hand. He moved his hands to the hem of his shirt and pulled it off. The first thing that Castiel saw, mostly because it was eye level, was the scars on the other man's hips and stomach. He moved the hand that was on Dean's hip to the scars. He lightly touched them and Dean just stood there. He watched as Cas traced the self inflicted scars with a sad look on his face. Castiel leaned forward and lightly kissed the one on the middle of Dean's stomach. He looked up to silently ask for permission to continue. He gave the man a slight smile and moved his right hand to run his fingers through Cas' hair. Cas looked back at the skin in front of him then moved to the scar next to the one he first kissed. Dean ran his fingers through the man's messy hair as Castiel kissed every scar on the taut skin. 

Once he finished his task he looked up at Dean. The man doesn't know how he never had Cas in his life before. He was absolutely amazing. He just worship all of Dean's mistakes. It was odd how that simple action had been the sexiest thing Dean had ever seen. He leaned down and kissed Castiel's chapped lips. Cas moved his hands to cup Dean's face to pull him closer as he deepened the kiss. Dean pulled away and pushed Castiel to lay flat on his back. He then moved to straddle the blue eyed man's muscular thighs. They went back to kissing and this time it was filled with passion. Both of Cas' hands where on Dean's waist while Dean's were holding himself up beside Cas' head. 

After some time Dean pulled away a bit and said, "Do you want to?" 

Castiel looked at the man on top of him confused. "Do I want to what?"

Dean sat up fully to rest his weight fully on Cas' thighs. "Do you want to...you know" Dean couldn't believe he was feeling nervous about a topic he usually talks about all the time. "Have sex?"

"Oh" Cas said slightly shocked. "I mean I'm okay with just this but if you want we can. I'm fine with just kissing" 

"Okay. How about you stay the night and we can kiss more and maybe cuddle?" Cas smiled since he didn't expect Dean to be into cuddling.

"I will love that" he kissed Dean as he smiled happily. Dean then moved to lay down and he pulled Cas down with him. They both pulled off their shoes and decided to keep their clothes on. They were both use to sleeping in their jeans due to days on end on the road. They laid down facing each other with their legs tangled together. Castiel lifted his hand and placed it on Dean's cheek. Dean closed his eyes, enjoying the feeling of Cas' hand caressing him. Cas moved in to kiss Dean's nose, then his forehead, then his eyelids, and then finally his lips. Dean had never felt this much adoration from anyone in his life. He doesn't even think he's ever showed his past partners this much adoration. 

Dean smiled and moved to bury his head into Castiel's chest. He felt Cas kiss the top of his head before he drifted off to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this is so short. Comment any ideas you have for future chapters. Also sorry for any mistakes.

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know if I should continue. Sorry for any errors and thank you for reading.


End file.
